[03] Therapy...really. (closed)

[callmeles]

Write a letter to someone currently in your life about the things you aren’t ready to talk to them about.

[The window had been open on her laptop for a long time, the blinking curser practically mocking her. Therapy. Hah! Who thought this had been a good idea? Oh. Right. She did. Well hell.]

Ben

Adonis

[This was for her, no one else was going to read it. So. Why was this so hard? Oh right, because it's supposed to be. It's therapy. If it was easy, everyone would be getting help. Right?

She sighed.]

Hi.

[Well. That's a good start.]

I'm sorry.

[She released a long pent up sigh.]

It's been a while since we last spoke or last saw each other. How are you? I'm... okay. I mean, I'm getting there. I'm further along since then.

I'm really sorry, Adonis.

I know a lot more now than I did then...hell, more than I knew last year. I felt guilty and almost responsible for so fucking long because I wasn't there to help or to save them.

I miss them every single damn day and if I do, I can't imagine what hell you've been through.

I thought when we had that final job taking out the last of them that it would be over and things would be okay again but it wasn't. Things don't feel okay. I guess I never fully grieved for them. I kept moving from one place to another to run from the memories and myself.

He would have been proud of you - of how you turned out. I know that. Both of them would have been.

I'm proud of you too. Not sure how much that means coming from me. We were always at each others throats but I see why now. More clearly than ever before. We were a lot alike.

I miss them and I miss you.

Let's grab a drink sometime.

-Le Piper